What's Love Got to Do With It?

On my birthday, June 4th in 1984, Tina Turner's label released the following song by her. The lyrics go:



You must understand
That the touch of your hand
Makes my pulse react
That it`s only the thrill
Of boy meeting girl
Opposites attract

It`s physical
Only logical
You must try to ignore
That it means more than that

Oh whats love got to do, got to do with it
What`s love but a second hand emotion
What`s love got to do, got to do with it
Who needs a heart
When a heart can be broken

It may seem to you
That i`m acting confused
When you`re close to me
If i tend to look dazed
I`ve read it someplace
I`ve got cause to be

There`s a name for it
There`s a phrase that fits
But whatever the reason
You do it for me

Oh whats love got to do, got to do with it
What`s love but a second hand emotion
What`s love got to do, got to do with it
Who needs a heart
When a heart can be broken

I`ve been thinking of a new direction
But i have to say
I`ve been thinking about my own protection
It scares me to feel this way

What`s love got to do, got to do with it
What`s love but a sweet old fashioned notion
What`s love got to do, got to do with it
Who needs a heart when a heart can be broken


Today, on February 12th, 2009, Valentine's Day is only 2 days away (so men, take note). "Love" is in the air. This begs a question: What is "love"?

To Tina Turner's speaker in the above song, love cannot be physical attraction or the butterfly gut feelings and excitement that accompany that attraction. Perhaps in the most telling lyrics of the song above, she says: "What's love got to do, got to do with it? What's love but a sweet old fashioned notion?" It seems that the speaker in her song has decided to detach physical attraction from love, and also has come to believe true love between men and women is mostly a dangerous delusion. These words belong to someone who has gotten "burned," and can't risk connecting physical attraction and love anymore. Poignant words, seeing that Tina's life with Ike Turner melded fierce attraction, cooperation, and also pain and abuse. Sounds like she knew her Shakespeare:

They do not love that do not show their love.
The course of true love never did run smooth.
Love is a familiar. Love is a devil. There is no evil angel but Love.
-- William Shakespeare

Many young people in our culture are following this logic of love to a "t." College campuses are rife with the "hook-up" culture, where physical relationship is detached from the risk of love and commitment. These grown kids wait for a later date, say 30 years old to take a stab at marriage. The US Census Bureau says divorce is also still alive and well, though with the increase in cohabitation and the decrease in marriage rates, it has waned somewhat.

I was somewhat surprised to see Valentine's "pajama gram" advertisement while watching FOX News. The catch-line? "The only present guaranteed to get a woman to take off her clothes." We are seeing a culture in which the real hope of attaching love to commitment and long-term care is either being degraded or deferred in favor of physical satisfaction and pleasure. After all--"Who needs a heart, when a heart can be broken?"

So "What's Love Got To Do With It?" Is there a definition for "love," in our modern, post-Christian context? Not from many voices in our culture. But the Bible speaks to the reality of love--and it's an act of will. It is not just magnetic feelings, but it is a marvelous commitment--a covenant. And covenants need sterner stuff at their base than momentary human emotion. God chose Christians as sons and and daughters in love from before the foundation of the world (see Eph. 1). This was at base an act of will, looking forward to a bright future with His children in which all things are giving Him glory.

As human beings, we can't choose our mate knowing that what they lack, we will sovereignly complete in the future. God does that with His church, but we can't. This is why it is so critical for Christians to find a Christian spouse--God can meld two of His own together better than any wisdom of the world! But, love here is again an act of will, strongly because the Christian's mind is not on vacation while the body, the flesh, makes choices based on physical cues. Again, I believe Shakespeare summarized this as well:

...Love is not love
Which alters when it alteration finds,
Or Bends with the remover to remove.
O, no! It is an ever-fixed mark,
That looks on tempests and is never shaken.
It is the star to every wandering bark,
whose worth's unknown, although his height be taken.
-- William Shakespeare

Being that human beings cannot know hearts as God does, there is always peril in relationships of all kinds. Sin can rear its ugly head and ruin the best of relationships horribly. However, when the mind (through obeying the Holy Spirit) is in control, the chances of heart-break are less. For example, suppose two Christians want to get married. They spend time getting to know each other and trying to care for one another. They discuss goals and dreams. They discuss, most importantly, faith. Through this process, they find out if they are compatible. If they are not, they can part ways. If they are, they might marry. This process is true in a certain way for unbelievers as well. They match up better with someone whose vision of life and dreams match their own. But, as with any kind of people, there is always the peril of the human heart's sin. So, there is always a risk in love relationships. That doesn't mean true love in life and marriage is not possible or even common. In fact, I would argue that strong love relationships between husbands and wives help keep this world civil and sane!

Is "love" just an "old fashioned notion?" I do think so. But it's God's notion--His thought. Mankind has just twisted it, resulting in pain and questioning. Love is eternal in the Holy Trinity. Father, Son, and Holy Ghost willingly and happily loved each other before they ever began creating the world. Love is an act of will, it is beautiful, and it has eternal consequences. It starts in Heaven, and when the Kingdom is sought above all things, the best of romantic love flows to earth.