Christian Grief

Having recently lost my father, I am in the grieving process. It is hard. When your world changes radically, you must change to adapt to the new reality. Here are some of my observations about grieving.

1. Sadness, depression, longing, and even anger are normal human emotions in a fallen world and normal expressions of grieving. In the following Scripture, Jesus acknowledges sorrow as a normal accompaniment of grief. Though Jesus does not address every emotion related to grieving here, it is pertinent to remember that He also knows and acknowledges our other emotions related to grieving because of His omniscience.

"So you will also have sorrow now. But I will see you again." --John 16:22

2. Grief is meant by God to be shared--not shunned. Paul commands Christian disciples to share one another's pain the best they can, because all are brothers and sisters in Christ and all are one body.

"...Weep with those who weep." --Romans 12:15
"So if one of the members suffers, all the members suffer with it..." --I Cor. 12:26

3. Grief is temporary, therefore, the Christian is to fight against feelings of despair (loss of hope) that accompany grief. Christ commands us to look to our future hope of seeing Him.

"So you also have sorrow now. But I will see you again. Your hearts will rejoice, and no one will rob you of your joy." --John 16:22

4. Grief over lost loved ones is very painful, but the Scripture testifies our Christian loved ones are with Jesus. Paul reminds us that when we see Jesus, we will also see those who have gone to be with Jesus when they died. This is a rallying cry against giving up on living fruitfully and abundantly for God in the midst of grief.

"For just as in Adam all die, so also in Christ all will be made alive. But each in his own order: Christ, the firstfruits; afterward, at His coming, the people of Christ." --I Cor. 15:22-23

5. Grief leaves us with a feeling of uncertainty as to how quickly our loved ones begin to experience heaven. Lest anyone think that the transition from the body to heaven is not instantaneous, Paul reminds us that to be absent from the body is to be present with Christ in heaven. This is great comfort in our grief over other's death's and the fear that sometimes accompanies our own consideration of our demise as Christians.

"Therefore, though we are always confident and know that while we are at home in the body we are away from the Lord--for we walk by faith, not by sight--yet we are confident and satisfied to be out of the body and at home with the Lord."
--2 Cor. 5:6-8

6. Grief caused by death and death itself are part of God's good plan--though we can't see all the reasons why or how. Our good God is sovereign over death and the grief it causes--an additional reason for Christian confidence.

"We know that all things work together for the good of those who love God: those who are called according to His purpose." --Romans 8:28

7. Grief for a Christian, because of the Scriptures already covered, should not be as severe as those who do not have hope of life after death, or those who reject the message of the Cross. If grief is terribly severe, this is normal, but the grieving Christian should focus powerfully on the reality of God's promises.

"We do not want you to be uninformed, brothers, concerning those who are asleep, so that you will not grieve like the rest, who have no hope." --1 Thess. 4:13

Grief is tough, and it is a long process. If you know someone who is grieving, grieve with them and gently remind them of God's promises with compassion. If you are grieving, do so in your own way, without shame, but never let your feelings lead your thoughts away from the sure foundation of Holy Scripture--fill your mind with God-ward thoughts, and remember His Word.